this time last year

This time last year I weighed at my heaviest ever.

I jumped on the scales* one morning and glanced at the numbers. Horrified. Mortified. I stopped in my tracks and went "crap, this needs to change". Between the end of October 2013 to the middle of February 2014 my weight, according to the scales had dropped about 5-6kgs. I was happy with that but needed/wanted to make more of a change

- From the middle of February up until July I was utterly obsessed with jumping on the scale to monitor the change in my body. Outwardly I was making great progress, people had noticed and made lovely comments and in the photos I could see a difference, too. Both in photos and when I looked in the mirror the change was becoming evident. 

- Then life happened. In the last two months with life being so crappy I've not stepped on the scales. And I reluctantly looked in the mirror, not wanting to see how my emotional state was effecting my physical state. Although I can see in photos that my body is changing, it's still a struggle to 'see' the difference when I look in the mirror. Some days are better than others. 

- I had lost almost 20kgs from this time last year up until July. The scales now measure a 14kg loss, but my style of training has changed. I do a mix of cardio and strength training. My body shape is still doing the changes it is doing and I don't take too much stock at the number on the scale says. It doesn't measure the effort I put in over the 9 months. 

My body now does things it couldn't do 4 months ago, 1 year ago or even 5 years ago. Some days my eating is better than others. But that is life. I won't give up. It's no longer about losing weight for me but changing my body and pushing it to do things it couldn't do previously.

*I have since learnt that scales CANNOT define who you are as a person, what your body is actually composed of or measure your self worth.